days go by
The last few days have been hard. As the sunlight has brightened, I’ve appreciated the near-Spring visuals — even as I found myself missing…everything…so much more. An odd combination. I’ve gone a bit machine-like: work, eat, sleep — repeat. Just walking through the hours. I never thought I’d lose so much, so quickly. There were things I never thought I’d lose at all. It still shocks me. Still hurts. The things I wish for now are almost embarrassingly sappy. I want to be happy, but I’m not sure how that song goes anymore. I’m mostly just exhausted and cold now, even as the days grow warmer.