October 2005 Archives

May your night be full of stylish pumpkins, cool costumes, and lots of treats!

Happy Halloween!

:-)

I'm dusty, but things here are looking better...

It is break time: chocolate and a tall cold glass of water. The air has slipped its warmth down to a level where the pipes yield their contents nicely chilled.

Daylight shows trees, costumed in fire-colors. The night flirts with ghosting your breath. Outside, now, it is pitch. Halloween decorations glimmering.

Here's to a safe, fun, and happy weekend.

I was going to write an entry...but it is 3 o'clock in the morning.

Rain. I was going to talk of that. And the dimness of the day, the chill of the night. I was going to allude to stress and ponder solitude.

But it is 3 o'clock in the morning, and this...

This is a reflex.

My brother and I had reached the top of a Seussian hill, overlooking a small town. The height was dizzying and a sudden fear made me press against and grab onto the Crayola-green grass. My worry was of falling. Vertigo tingled along my back and limbs. I wasn't afraid that I would tumble down the hill, into the town. I gripped the vivid turf to keep from falling up, into the endless primary sky.

I woke, face-down, gripping the futon. Still tingling. Still afraid of falling up.

Those feelings have lingered...

A rusted spring un-cranking, slow. Oiled by purple-red wine. The daylight was crystal, blue and cold. Trees going fire-colors. Drizzles of chilly gray rain. Waiting. A TV burbling about weather. For hours.

Then. Later:

Pizza, dishes. Deep colors in a pretty glass -- and the computer screen. The tap of keystrokes. My thoughts...tipping toward sleep.

Thursday.

My mouse broke, so the computer was off the menu for Sunday. I drank some green tea while helping with dinner. I was tired -- and cold, all day. Watched the 4th episode of Gilgamesh, in the evening.

A sense of being unsettled grew throughout the night. I felt...fretful.

My eyes are tired now -- and I want to sleep. But I want to be awake, doing something, too. I just don't know what it is.

- 12:08 AM

Sleep ran out at the tail (tale?) end of 4 AM, with a strange intricate dream of odd character profiles on 60 Minutes.

I rose with the phrase and, dressed again, went to get a fresh glass of water. The moon was as bright as a searchlight. It cast inky, sharp-edged shadows on the deck. I kept the illumination low, in my room: a visual whisper of one bulb, instead of the full-on chorus of them all.

It is ten after five, now. I said a prayer. My eyes are still tired.

Toutes ces heures...

- 5:19 AM

On the clock, seconds are blinking. The sky is a shadowy shade of lavender. My hair is wet.

I watched Episode 7 of Haibane Renmei again. It seemed to fit the moment.

The air is cool in here.

I am tired, again.

- 7:05 AM

I wrote this on paper, originally. Scavenged one of my old computer mice (mouses?) so I could use my machine again. It is daylight.

Quiet, except for birds...and traffic. Mostly traffic, actually, at the moment...

- 7:51 AM

It snowed in my dreams last night...

But today was bright and warm: smooth motion, lovely skies.

I bought the first volume of the Gilgamesh anime on October tenth. Groovy.

I also took pictures:

And this pretty on my Flickr account.

Now I'm unwinding. And birthday shopping, online...

It is an interesting statement on the rapid advances in robotic technology that, one year after no autonomous vehicles were able to even finish DARPA's race, four robots crossed the finish line on Saturday. The winner was a customized Volkswagon from the Stanford team named, Stanley.

Time flies when you're evolving...

In the early evening, my breath turned visible in the air.

A gold moth clung to the door glass.

Music summoned memories -- and accompanied.

Later, after I came back, the deeper hours misted my face with rain.

The gold moth remained.

A late-night snack, in the dining room.

The centaur's gift was tawny.

Clean clean is the mantra, today. I started out with carpets and kitchen...now it is website directories and test blogs. Things on my webhost are a lot neater now. At some point I am going to upgrade my MovableType installation (the program that runs The Allurium) to version 3.2 -- but I'm taking my time with that, 'cause it's a biggie and I'll have to re-do my stylesheets again.

Other than that, I'm enjoying some wine...and waiting for Lost.

Tuesday is high definition mixed with a layer of sunny haze. I'm drifting through on the blurred side (at least for the moment). I feel somewhat unsettled. Vauguely low.

Maybe it is just lack of coffee.

Leaning hard on some coffee helped. The focus is tightened now.

A walk in the warmer air, outside, lifted the ceiling as well. I took some shots of ripening berries.

Now I'm getting dinner together. Listening to Dido.

Squinting at the screen.

Crickets are singing down the day; the sky has gone a dark gray-blue. The wine in my glass is purple. Almost.

I feel quiet.

Oh yeah, here's one of those berries I mentioned earlier:

There is a rhythm, deepening the night. Earphoned. An aural world bounded by black windows and dark skies. Hours ticking (unheard) toward two. October slipping in unnoticed. The day was crystalline. This night? This night is invisible. The beat, looping back.

Hello October...

I need a shave.